1. Religiously learn all the writing rules. They’re out there–just look them up.
2. Write them down, preferably by hand. In the very least, print them out.
3. Take those pieces of paper and put them in a fire-proof container, preferably outdoors.
4. Squirt liberal amounts of lighter fluid into said container.
…you can figure out the rest.
Now go create something we’ve never read before.